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The Perfect Family

What is the That, Really?

By Shel Franco

"Aren't you going to try for a girl?" friends asked in disbelief. I feverishly defended my decision to stop having children. "We only ever wanted two kids. Really. I'm thrilled with my boys." But, in the back of my mind, I wondered who I was really trying to convince.

I was the product of a genderly balanced family. Saturdays gushed with the excitement of mother-daughter shopping trips, while my brother and father roughed it up at the hockey rink. My mother glowed as my Brownie troop leader. My father shined as my brother's soccer coach. Almost every family that I knew echoed, "Father, Mother, Sister, Brother."

So naturally, I expected to know the joys of a daughter. I longingly strolled through department stores, running my fingers over velvet dresses and ruffled socks. I daydreamed about giddy conversations after her first date, and how beautiful she would look on her wedding day. Everywhere I went, I noticed the mother/daughter teams around me. When I watched my girlfriends interact with their daughters, I could feel my heart race. I couldn't wait to mother my little girl.

After my first-born was a son, I redesigned my image of motherhood and put the dresses and lace on hold. Before too long, I found myself knee deep in baseballs, fire engines and ferocious beasts. The house was a sea of blue. Then, I noticed the growing connection between my husband and son. "Mommy can't pitch good like you, Dad," my son would protest, as I shuffled aside. I knew when I played out of my league.