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Home › Articles › Single Mother › Single By Choice

Single By Choice

Choosing Single Motherhood

By Virginia Gilbert

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Bock responds to Fagan's dour prognosis by examining our concept of family. "If you define family by structure -- two parents and a marriage contract -- then, sure, this is a threat," says Bock. "But if you define family by process -- is there love, is it safe, is there supervision and nurturing? -- then, this is no threat at all."

Bock goes on to state that the feminist agenda has allowed women to consider a lifestyle choice that 30 or 40 years ago would have been unthinkable. "The acceptance level gets better every year," says Bock. "Celebrities are doing it, more is known about sperm banks." But statistics aside, what is the experience of single motherhood really like? Is the picture as bleak as Fagan asserts or as liberating as Bock attests?

To answer that question, Pregnancy Today spoke with four women who either are currently single and pregnant or have had a child essentially without a partner's support. While these women come from vastly different socioeconomic backgrounds, they are all motivated by the same thing: a basic and powerful need to be a mother.

Adrienne's Story
Adrienne, 30, is expecting a baby in August. Her pregnancy happened early in a new relationship and was accidental, what she calls the result of "poor birth control." At this time, the baby's father is not providing emotional or financial support.

Of all the women interviewed for this article, Adrienne appears to have the toughest road ahead of her. A temp office worker, she knows that having a child will be "extremely difficult financially." No doubt in part because of her economic situation, her family has urged her to give the baby up for adoption.


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