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Home › Articles › Mental and Emotional Health › No "Ifs," "Ands" or "Buts"

No "Ifs," "Ands" or "Buts"

Overcoming Disagreements during Pregnancy

By Katherine Bontrager

Pages:  1  2  3  4  5  

  • How do you feel about circumcision?
  • How about medical help – traditional or alternative and in what situations?
  • How do you feel about vaccines?
  • What do you want to feed your child? Do you think breastfeeding is important, or are you OK with formula? Will you want to make your own baby food or buy it?
    • Child-rearing Choices
    • Will one of you need to give up or put a career on hold while your kids are young?
    • Will you want to hire extra help with childcare?
    • Who's cleaning house, making breakfast and handling social obligations?
    • How much time does each of you need alone or for your work?
    • Are you willing to change your life around for your child in case of a special condition or illness?
    • Who will change their schedule around when your child gets sick and needs one of you to stay at home?
    • How do you feel about discipline and boundaries? Are you a pushover or very strict?
    • Do you want your child educated in public schools or private?
    • How do you feel about television for your child?
    • Are you willing to let kids express feelings? Do you expect them to "snap out of it quickly" or are you into distracting them away from their feelings?

    "You may find that many of these will be non-issues for you both, while others will need a lot more thought," Schiffer says. "Obviously, you won't agree on everything. At the same time, if you're on opposite sides of the fence with some of the big issues, you may need to stop and see if you can arrive at a common ground. If your mate says the child has to be raised Catholic and the whole family must go to church every Sunday, and this clashes with your being a practicing Buddhist, you probably need to talk. Hopefully you can both find the room to listen to what each other feels is important and find the flexibility to bend when you need to reach a middle ground."


    Pages:  1  2  3  4  5  

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