Two Under 2

The Joys and Challenges of Children Close in Age

By Mark Stackpole

Nothing changes your life quite like having a child. The fact that someone so small can have an impact so large takes some getting used to. Priorities change, schedules become disrupted, finances tighten and a lack of sleep can lead to some emotionally trying times. Of course, bountiful rewards await those who make these sacrifices – a child's love is a gift unmatched by any we might purchase for ourselves.

What happens, then, when more than one child is running around the house in diapers? The families of twins and triplets deserve a special category all their own, but any family with "two (or more) under 2" may find itself in a similar situation. Babies can have a synergistic effect – if parents are not careful, they can end up feeling exhausted, panicked and even outnumbered.

Dr. Shoshanna Bennett is a psychologist specializing in pregnancy and postpartum issues, author of Beyond the Blues: A Guide to Understanding and Treating Prenatal and Postpartum Depression (Mood Swings Press, 2003) and president of Postpartum Support International. "Every day I meet with new and expectant parents who are wondering and worrying about their roles," Dr. Bennett says of her practice in Danville, Calif. "When someone says you are doubly blessed to have two children in diapers, you may be tempted to hand them over and say, 'Here you go! I'll pick them up in a few years.' It is utterly exhausting to raise children close together, but the benefits are plenty – creativity and organization are the keys."

Laci Mulick, a stay-at-home mom from Omaha, Neb., and her husband Ryan, an IT consultant, had been married for eight months when they conceived their first child. "We were thrilled!" says Mulick. "We went shopping and bought the most expensive crib we could. But at our 20-week ultrasound, we found that there were two heads on the screen. Good thing I was lying down or I would have passed out. Needless to say, we returned that expensive crib and went and got two that were much less costly than the original. And we completely rebuilt the baby's room and made it perfect for both of them." With the healthy arrival of twins Darby and Mason in 2002, the Mulick family was off to a strong start.

What they had not planned on was having another baby so soon. When the twins were 8 months old, the Mulick's learned that Laci was pregnant again. Being the parents of three children before having been married for three years was a notion that took a little time to get used to. The couple made arrangements to move into a bigger house, buy another crib and get a car "with enough room to seat five plus fit a triple stroller and all of the baby amenities."

Daughter Bayler's eventual arrival in February 2004 was complicated by the fact that she was born with a syndrome that doctors have not yet been able to identify. The research continues, and, happily, Bayler has reached every infant milestone so far. "I know the tough stuff is never behind me, but there is so much fun and excitement ahead," says Laci Mulick.

Want to see more?

• 2 Under 2 Discussion Board
• Twins Today
• She Won't Break! New Dads With Newborn Fears
• Welcoming Your Second Child
• Sleep is on the Way!
• Talk about it!