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Home › Articles › Fatherhood › Postpartum Dad

Postpartum Dad

Supporting Your Partner

By Carma Haley

Pages:  1  2  3  4  

You may think that the birth of a child means the end of intimacy. Not true. Intimacy in a marriage or a relationship can be maintained without sexual relations as long as the proper touches and words are incorporated.

"If the relationship is a good one, wives will let their husbands know when they are ready for more and the husband will be understanding and patient," Deutsch says. "Just because there is no sex, doesn't mean there can't be intimacy. Holding each other, hugging, kissing, holding hands, cuddling and letting your partner know you love her will build that intimacy and keep it there."

"My wife wasn't able to be intimate for over a month before and a few months after the birth of our child," Shoemaker says. "It was difficult at times, but the last thing I wanted to do was to put any type of pressure on her. I mean, after all, her body had been through a lot and with the pressures of a new baby, the last thing she needed from me was more."

Sexless Intimacy Helps Mom
While giving birth, the muscles of a women's pelvis are stretched, pulled, and possibly cut or torn. Just as a strained muscle of the back or leg, these muscles take time to heal before they can begin functioning properly again, Deutsch says. It's also possible for pain to accompany the "worked" muscles, making it difficult to sit or walk – let alone have sexual relations.

However, as hormones may be very active during the first few weeks after birth, Mom may still crave the attention, touch and affection that would normally be given during sex. "Mom still wants to know that she is attractive, loved and desired by her partner," Deutsch says. "This is the perfect time for Dad to build a nonsexual but intimate relationship with his wife. By not placing any pressure on her, Dad allows her to concentrate on recovering and taking care of her family – including him."


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