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Birth Team Considerations
A Certified Doula Answers Questions on Choosing a Birth Team
By Kelly Camden, Certified Doula
Even when partners are providing wonderful labor support, they will need to eat, use the bathroom, make phone calls, go to the car or take a nap. Without a second support person, the mother would be left alone while the father does these things.
Doulas are there to support the couple during labor and birth. There is plenty for everyone to do. The doula doesn't take the place of the father, but she does take care of all of the little details so that he can be more present for the laboring woman. Doulas also suggest position changes and massage based on the baby's position, progress and stage of labor. She can be a great resource for beginning breastfeeding as well as answering questions when you return home.
If financial concerns are part of the hesitation to hire a doula, you might consider asking around for the names of new doulas or those who offer a sliding scale.
When laboring mothers feel safe and supported during labor, it helps them to relax and encourages labor progress. During labor, a mother needs to be "in the zone," tuning in to what she is feeling and what she needs to do. It is very difficult to do this with an audience. When women have guests during labor, they often feel that they need to accommodate them, which truly hinders labor progress. Don't get worn out waiting for relatives to go home. Sometimes, the best plan is to postpone calling family until birth is near or when the baby is born.
If you would like to include your mother-in-law in a different way, ask her to be in charge of calling other family members, baking a birthday cake or cooking a meal for you when you get home.
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