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Bringing Home Baby

A Dad's Eye View of Bonding and Interacting with Baby

By Mark Stackpole

Dads are often doing some great bonding and interacting and not giving themselves enough credit for them, even during something that seems as exclusive as breastfeeding. "Fathers can be available and ready at the transition from this process, whether it is for the after-nursing burp or continuing the settling routine for bedtime," Gaertner says. "There are many ways that dads can provide those same feelings of closeness that breastfeeding offers. Experiences of cuddling, rocking, singing and soothing – especially with close or skin-to-skin contact – can be so meaningful for the developing father-baby relationship."

So you've shopped, cuddled and done everything that you can think of to remind your baby that there is more to life than hanging out at Mom's Diner. Try being yourself and inviting your baby into your world.

"Want to be a good dad? Don't panic," says Brian Sack, a humorist and author of In the Event of My Demise: 20 Things My Son Needs to Know (HarperOne, 2008). "First of all, your kid is programmed to love you unconditionally, even if you are a trial lawyer. You'd really have to work hard to screw that up. All you need to provide is affection and attention and the child will thrive, not to mention adore you. It's really simple, yet people over-think it. Affection and attention. It will make you the center of your child's world – even if technically, he's the total boss of you."

One of Sack's most powerful bonding experiences did not come crib-side or even state-side. "I recently spent a couple of days in Berlin, alone with my son, and it occurred to me that I'd created the world's greatest drinking buddy, albeit one who can't drink," he says. "But he thinks I'm cool. He listens to everything I say. He entertains me. And he does whatever I want to do. He's also the ultimate wingman, not that it does me any good. One of my favorite memories is sitting in a hotel room with him, ordering room service and staying up too late watching bizarre German television. It was a simple, yet indelible moment."

Want to see more?

• Check out our Article Library.
• Bonding from the Beginning: Use Baby's Senses to Create That Special Connection
• Home Is Where the Hearts Are: A Dad's Eye View of Bringing Baby Home for the First Time
• An Easy Labor? A Dad's Eye View of Labor and the Birthing Process
• Talk about it!