Only One Baby Shower?

You're a mother-to-be (again), and are wondering if another baby shower is coming your way to celebrate the occasion. Depending on your family's and friends' philosophy for the reason to have a shower, you may or may not be given a party for the birth of your second or third child. The etiquette surrounding showers can be tricky, so we have asked two moms and one expert to help sort out the answers.

"In my family, growing up, we always had showers for each baby and it was clear that the focus was the baby," says Kim Chapman of Ankara, Turkey, and mother of one. Chapman doesn't understand the thinking that it is rude or a gift-grab to have more than one shower – she was given four for her first child!

This was partly due to her moving while being pregnant, and then after the birth of her baby she moved to a different country from her hometown of Edmonton, Alberta (and a party was given after the moves by different people). Each one was a celebration of the new child she was about to have and not about the big gifts – she took care of buying the big-ticket items herself.

For those in the yes camp, the reason behind a baby shower is to welcome the baby into the world and celebrate its new beginning. Each baby should have his own celebration; gifts do not have to be a part of the occasion or at least not in the traditional sense.

Chapman believes that people go ridiculously overboard on the first shower and that's probably why some people resist the idea of a shower for a second. "[A] shower should be about small gifts for the baby – new clothes, diapers or little toys," she says.

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