Baby Shower Registry and Gift Etiquette

Most first-time moms-to-be cannot wait to grab that register gun at their favorite discount, department or baby store and go to town. But before you're off to the races, there is some etiquette required – or at least suggested – for the gift giving and receiving process.

"A major factor you always need to remember when registering is to have a wide range of prices," says Colleen A. Rickenbacher, a business etiquette expert and author of Be on Your Best Business Behavior (Brown, 2004). "Don't just register for items you can't afford to buy. Stay more in the low to middle range with a few items that possibly people could go together to purchase (stroller, highchair, crib). If your family and friends are spread out over a few states, then make sure you register at least in one store that is nationwide. Make it easy for them to purchase your gift and get it to you in time for the shower." Most stores will even deliver for a small fee.

Registering at one or two stores is appropriate. "Even if all of your guests are local, [I] highly recommend that you register at a store or stores that are convenient for your guests," Rickenbacher says. "Don't have them traveling an hour or so just to get to a specific children's boutique [where] you are solely registered. Leave those gifts at that boutique for close family members."

Alison Minton, an event planner and hospitality consultant in New York City, agrees that it's a good idea to have a range of prices on the register, but feels one store is plenty. "No more than two stores for registry, but best to stick to one (this isn't a wedding)," she says.

Should you print the registry information on the invitation? Even the etiquette experts disagree on this point.

"Even though the etiquette books will tell you 'not to include a list of items for the mothers-to-be' on the invitation, I highly disagree," Rickenbacher says. "In today's world we do not have time to respond to people and tell them where the future mothers may be registered or what is on their list. I feel you can very professionally place on the bottom of the invitation that name or names of stores where they are registered. Most people will respond (RSVP) via e-mail or voice mail so [it's] just more convenient and efficient that this information is provided for them."

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