You've just found out the exciting news: You're expecting a baby! This is great news for you and your husband, but what about your children and stepchildren? Will it be a joyous celebration of your new blended family, or will it simply mix things up?

According to Elizabeth Church, associate professor at Memorial University in St. Johns, Canada, stepmother and author of Stepping Lightly (Harper Collins, Fall 2003), the reaction will vary depending on the individual child.

"Do not expect existing children will react with the same joy as you feel," says Church. "The news of a pregnancy can be scary to children. They may be afraid of being supplanted or ignored once the new baby arrives." With some thoughtful preparation and realistic expectations, a new baby can solidify a family.

"We told the kids right away that I was pregnant," says Nancy Kotowitz of Westfield, Mass. The Kotowitzs arranged to have her children and her husband's children present when they made the announcement.

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