This has been an unusually good week for me emotionally. It is probably due to the fact that baby is moving around quite a bit. He has probably realised that his mother needs the assurance of his health and happiness!

I tend to worry that I will not have the blessing of a "child of my own" after the adoption plan. The miscarriage added to it, and I am sure I will have doubts off and on throughout this pregnancy until I actually see and hold this little squidge. I tend to be a person who is afraid to be too happy -- if you're happy it will be taken away, and as long as I make a fool of myself and worry a lot everything works out alright. Argh!

One of the issues that has been brought up lately between Jon and I is the effect this baby is going to have on our families. DH is an only child, so our children will be the only grandchildren for his parents. My parents went through my first pregnancy and got to be Grandma and Grandpa for just one day.

This is the first grandchild on both sides, *and we are 'taking him away' when he is two months old*. Uh oh. I am working up to the days when we will face the comments and disappointment from both sides. Everyone is being good so far, but there will be so many expectations. There is the worry that what we do try to do will not be enough. This worry is par for MY course -- I am only 20 weeks and I am already thinking about it!!!

Well, I am hap-hap-happy that Sguidge is moving and shaking and rolling around in my belly. I look at his ultrasound photo everyday and am just amazed at how cute he is! I can tell he will look like his Daddy ;-)

And, I would like to say "Oh Happiness!" to Melissa for the great first doctor appointment she had!! YEA!!!!!!!!!

Have a great day, all!

Amy H and Squidgey Ian