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December 17, 2001
December 17, 2001
25 Weeks
This has been one tiring week, I am simply exhausted, beaten down and in need of a nice, relaxing massage. As long as I live, I don’t want to go to another Christmas party, see another mall, or walk one more step in any direction other than my own bed. OK, I am exaggerating, but you get the picture. Where to start...
How I Feel
Somehow I managed to catch a cold this week so unless my mouth is always slightly open, I can no longer breathe - a pleasant sensation if you’ve never experienced it. When I sleep, my breathing is so heavy, when I wake up I feel like I have been licking sandpaper all night. I try to counteract this with a glass of water by my bed but if I even take one sip, I end up having to go to the bathroom all night long and without fail, I constantly manage to lose my balance and hit something on the way - my toe, an arm, etc.
For the most part, I eat very healthily - salads, proteins, no sweets, etc. However, one day last week when Charles and I were at the mall shopping, we stopped at this really neat hamburger joint where I caved and had a hamburger (something I never order) AND onion rings. (I only ate 3 before I felt too guilty and left the rest). Well, this was one mistake I will not make a second time. When I got home that night, I soon discovered the joys of acid reflux, heartburn and indigestion. It was like this acid-y liquid would keep bubbling up into my throat, making me choke. I know some people experience this even when they are not pg and I sincerely offer those people my deepest condolences. I should have known to expect this, my pg calendar said on the 25 week page that this is when a lot of pg women begin to experience heartburn and so far, every time the calendar mentions any pg symptom or sensation, I get it.
One another thing that I noticed in common with the calendar is my recent development of a sweet tooth. I am not a chocolate person, especially fancy chocolates. If I have to eat chocolate, it’s got to be plain with no cremes, nuts, goos or mush on the inside. Well, one of my friends sent us Godivas for Christmas (which normally make me gag), and one night I had such a craving for them, I ate three before I shoved the box away.
Another night I just HAD to have cupcakes or I would die. I sent Charles out to the supermarket at 11 p.m. in search of freshly baked cupcakes and he came back with these absolutely disgusting, cannot-be-made-of-ingredients-from-this-planet, green and red cupcakes. I took one bite and threw the whole thing out. I later read in my pg calendar that this week the baby is developing taste buds and therefore a craving for sweets which transfers over to the mother or the host, in this case. Today I ate a pack of Chewy Sweet Tarts and I didn’t even want it. This will obviously not bode well at my weigh in on Wednesday but at this point, I can’t worry about it. I have been so good up to this past week and have managed to gain anyway so I felt justified in indulging just a little bit.
How the Baby is Doing
The baby does move around a lot but s/he hasn’t been quite as “forceful” this week as in others. What I mean is, there have been times in the past where certain kicks were so strong they would startle me, but this week, I have just felt smaller, less obvious kicks and they are not quite as strong. Does this worry me? Hell. Yes. I keep thinking the baby is deformed or something and can’t kick properly. Of course, I realize that the baby maybe just changed positions and that is why I can’t feel the kicks as much. They are definitely there, no doubt about that and they are relatively frequent, just not as much as they were say, a week ago. I plan to ask the doctor about it when I go for my check-up Wednesday. One thing I noticed about the baby’s movement is that there is one song in particular s/he likes. Whenever I play the song “Tiny Dancer” by Elton John from the “Almost Famous” soundtrack, the baby really starts to move.
Busy, Busy Week
I had such a busy week, much more so than I usually have. I guess with Christmas coming and all, I have had a lot more to do - go to the post office, shopping, Christmas cards, etc. - I barely have had time to sit down for one second, let alone get on the computer.
On Tuesday I met a woman who I met via this site, a woman named Kami who had her son Ezra back in May. Kami had posted on my board several times so we finally got together at her place and had a great time. Ezra was so cute and such a good baby, he never even cried. (How much you want to bet I won’t be that lucky)?
I just have to interrupt this train of thought to say that one of the reasons I love this site so much is because of the fabulous friends I have made that I otherwise would never have met. There’s Kami as I mentioned, Kamina and Mary to name a few. And then there are the many other women with whom I have forged amazing friendships and have never even met. I think it is such a wonderful outlet and benefit to have all these great women to ask questions, compare notes and share this wonderful experience with.
To continue on with my busy week, Friday night we went to a Christmas party which was mediocre at best. Saturday I went to a baby shower of a girlfriend that I went to college with. She is due in January so I was shocked when I saw here because she and I looked exactly the same size. The shower was held in a suite at the Mariott and was catered with all this wonderful food. There were only about 18 people but it was really the perfect size and everyone really got to talk and have fun. We all played a bunch of those different baby shower games, one of which embarrassed me completely. It was the game where you have to guess the mother-to-be’s waistline by cutting a piece of ribbon to the length you anticipate the waist to be. Looking for the easy way out, I simply put the ribbon around my own waist, thinking that I would probably be short a few inches or so, seeing as how I am 3 months behind the mother-to-be. Well, I won the game because my ribbon was the perfect length. Does that not say it all?
Another interesting thing that happened at this shower: for the first time in this pg, everyone told me I was carrying like I was having a boy. I guess that just goes to show that all that “carrying” nonsense is just that.
Saturday night Charles and I went to yet ANOTHER Christmas party which was quite painful - you know the kind. The only person we knew was the host and normally, Charles and I are the types who will initiate conversation with strangers. This night however, neither of us felt up to it. So instead, we simply stood and talked to each other and stuffed our faces with shrimp cocktail. The house of the hostess was small and people kept squishing my stomach. My back was killing me and there was no place to sit. After an hour, we politely bowed out using my pg as our reason. It certainly is nice to have this built-in excuse.
The Tree
Sunday morning Charles and I got up early and went out to breakfast. We wanted to get a good start to our day as our goal for that morning was to find a Christmas tree. Last year we had a beautiful tree, a Frasier fir that was approximately 9 ft. tall. I loved this tree and hoped to find one that was just as nice. The first tree place we went to had about 3 Frasier firs and the rest were all some other kind I didn’t like. I am a VERY picky person and when it comes to trees, I am even worse. My favorite pine tree is the Frasier fir, not only because it has that pretty grey-green color but because this particular tree has the strongest scent of all the pines. So, when I saw that all there were were these 3 skimpy FFs, we decided to go to the next place.
Last year, our 9 ft. tree cost only $30. The next place we went to they had 7 footers for $70 that didn’t look half as good as what we had last year. Naturally, it was difficult for me to warm up to the idea of paying so much more for a lesser tree and I decided that I simply couldn’t do it. Charles of course, being the man, kept reiterating over and over again that we didn’t need a big tree, that it was only the 2 of us, that our place is not large and that he didn’t feel like dragging another big tree up all those stairs again. Naturally, I listened to not a word and directed him to take us to the next tree place up the street. For me, it wasn’t so much the height that was bothering me but the Charlie-Brown-Christmas-resemblance of the trees that I couldn’t take. At the third place, there were a nicer group of FFs, but they were all small, like 5 ft. and under. They were also running about $55-60 which I thought was an utter rip-off. I could see Charles getting all happy at the prospect of having this smaller tree and therefore less hassle which is when my little mind kicked into overdrive. Charles asked me if there were any trees that I liked and instead of being honest and saying “No, I want a better and/or bigger tree, I simply said, “Just get whatever you want, I don’t even care at this point.” I knew that if I came right out and said that I wanted a big tree, Charles would have put his foot down but if I pretended like I didn’t care (and that my Christmas would be ruined), I knew he would go out of his way to get what I wanted. : ) As luck would have it, the last place we went to had FFs that were all very nice sizes and in beautiful condition. The tree guy offered us this nice big one for $50 and before I said yes, I looked at Charles and he looked at me. He then said, “This is what you wanted all along, isn’t it?” I just said “I really don’t care, just get what you want.” Charles told the guy to go ahead and load it on the car. But then he turned to me and said, “You are one little brat, you know that? Nobody on this planet needs a nine foot tree, even if they are giving them away for free.” But he was laughing when he said it. I ask you: Am I so wrong for not wanting to pay a fortune for a crappy, tiny tree when we got such a nice one last year for so much less? Is it wrong of me to want to search until I find what I want? Is it wrong for me to be a satisfied shopper? Is it WRONG for me to want to have a nice tree in my house? I think not. Before we got in the car to drive off, the tree guy came over to us after strapping the tree to the roof. He turned to us and said, “That sure is a beauty of a tree you got there...it was the last 12 footer on the lot.” Charles didn’t say a word the entire way home...but I could tell he was trying hard not to laugh.
Baby Show
After dropping the tree off, showering and changing, Charles and I went to a Baby Show, for which we had received an invitation in the mail. What this “show” actually turned out to be and what we expected, were two totally different things. What I expected was something similar to a bridal show/fair, where they have booths and stalls and vendors and information, etc. Instead, what we got was roped into a 2 hour live infomercial in one of the suites at a local Sheraton. The event started out smoothly with the lecturer talking about baby safety and product safety and things of this nature. It was all quite interesting...at first. Note: I do not necessarily agree with the views espoused here, I am simply listing them. Some of the issues discussed were:
1) how you need to have your car seats installed properly by a firehouse, police station or hospital, etc.
2) how any product made out of white plastic is less safe and of cheaper quality than a product made out of colored plastic. This has to do with the chemical components of the material which is why you will never see a child car seat (not infant), made out of white plastic.
3) how the Pep Perego infant seat has been recalled several times, much to my chagrin seeing as how that is the one we liked.
4) how cup holders on strollers are a safety hazard. Many children have been burned by scalding hot coffee that gets spilled from the cup holder down onto the baby.
Finally, he broached my favorite topic - walkers. He basically quoted everything that I said about walkers in my last entry, adding that any baby product that allows a child to suspend from his crotch is a dangerous item. Why? Because according to various experts (that I have never heard of), hanging from your "crotch" (his words, not mine) encourages bowleggedness because it spreads the baby’s legs apart. He also added that walkers have been banned in CA, Canada and Europe - this was complete news to me. I appreciated where he was coming from, but thought he was a bit stressed out about it. I mean, some people may not prefer walkers but no one is a bad parent if they have one! I just didn’t get this guy’s venom. I soon learned why.
For the second half of the show, the lecturer switched to the REAL reason we were all there - to try and sell us this one brand of baby product originating from the late 1930’s - Babee Tenda. Has anyone ever heard of this brand? I never had but if you want to imagine a picture of the style of these products, just imagine the most ancient-looking piece of baby furniture you have ever seen and that is what Babee Tenda stuff looks like. The main product he was pushing was this feeding table that was low to the ground and on wheels, - retailing for about $500. When he got to the part about the price, I started looking around for the guy’s crack pipe because I just knew he had to be smoking one if he thought anyone was going to pay $500 for this item of the yesteryear - I don’t care how safe it is. I will admit that the product looked very sturdy, had good reviews and probably works very well, so I am not criticizing this manufacturer if any of you out there own any Babee Tenda products. I was just a little pissed that I was brought to this “show” under false pretenses. When we left that place, Charles and I both truly felt like we had been had. We were handed our “free gift” on the way out - $150 worth of free portraits at some studio way out in no-man’s land. A complete waste. So - word to the wise, if you get any invitations like these in the mail, be sure to check out the source of the invite before wasting your time.
After the show, Charles and I went to the mall to complete our Christmas shopping. We got most of it done and by that time, I was about ready to collapse. First of all, I think I have permanent chafe marks on my thighs from pulling my pants up and then down again for about a 100 times. I must go to the bathroom every 20 ft. As of right now, I can tell you where to find any public rest room anywhere in northern VA, I know them all. My hands look like I have gone ice-fishing in Siberia. They are so chapped and dry from all the washing I do. Thank God for shea butter otherwise I would be facing skin grafts in my immediate future.
And another reason I am ready to collapse might have to do with the fact that chivalry IS dead, much to the disbelief of the masses. As you all well know by now, I definitely look pg. There is no doubt about it. Why is it then, that whenever I am in a public place, no one EVER offers me their seat, never watches out to make sure they don’t hit my stomach when they pass me by in an aisle? I was at the post office the other day and had to take a number just to pick up a package. My number was 64 and they were on #2 so clearly, I had quite the wait ahead of me. All the chairs were taken (around 30), so I just stood in the middle of the room, my back aching while people just stood and watched me. Mind you, I have no problem standing and didn’t even want to sit, but I simply couldn’t believe that people have lost all sense of decency. I would never have let a pg woman stand for an hour while I, a strapping, healthy man of 35 or so, sat comfortably in a chair. As I said, I was fine to stand, it is just the principal of the thing. Simply deplorable.
I have rambled on so long tonight and I am sure I have put many of you to sleep so I apologize for that. I didn’t intend to go on for so long but I just kept remembering things I wanted to say. Before I go, I just wanted to ask your opinions on diaper bags:
Diaper Bags
I see a lot of women in the area carrying the Kate Spade diaper bag and was wondering if it is worth spending all that money on this product, especially when it seems to possess no special feature. I happen to love the look of the bag, but when I went to inspect the inside, I was surprised to see there were no compartments, pockets, pouches, not even a changing pad. For the $200 price tag, you would think that the bag included an au pair to change the baby for you. Is there something I am missing about this bag? Are there any others that you can recommend? I saw an Eddie Bauer one that was nice and very “compartmental,” as well as one from L.L. Bean and some others that came from a catalogue. I am going to need 2 - one for me, one for Charles, so any recommendations would be helpful. Note: I am not a pastels/bunnies/bears/ type person. I like plain and simple, solid colors, basic patterns.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
After rereading this entry, I realize I complained a lot this week - my feet, my back, my cold, my indigestion. I didn’t mean to, I am simply trying to record with accuracy exactly what it is I feel physically. I now see that I failed to include what I feel emotionally.
When my baby reads this one day, I just want them to know that despite every ache, pain and minor discomfort I experience, I would endure 100 times worse for them. What little bit of pain I do experience from time to time is completely worth it compared to what is awaiting me in only 3 1/2 short months. This child is the best Christmas gift I could ever hope for, even if s/he doesn’t come until after Christmas. I daydream about this baby every day and impatiently await the moment where my daydreaming can turn into reality. I have wanted this for so long and so far it has been the most memorable, life-changing, special event I have ever had the pleasure of living.
A year ago today, I had my third, unsuccessful IUI and I thought my life was virtually over. Here I am a year later, only 3 or so months away from becoming a mother. Never in a million years did I imagine that I would be this lucky and that my life could take such a drastic turn for the better. I can’t believe how much I already love this baby.
Until next week,
Corinne and her baby
EDD 4-1-02
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