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September 3, 2001
I know I'm not alone when I mention my extreme food cravings. As a pregnant woman, I've come to accept them and I only try to rein them in when they appear to be heading out of control. But with this pregnancy my food cravings have gone from being maybe a tad off at times to eyebrow up weird.
For example, I cannot stop thinking about chicken McNuggets. Don't ask me why, because quite frankly, I detest McDonald's. In fact, I'm sorta a Taco Bell girl. But my once pristine marriage to one fast food franchise has been blown by this pregnancy. I've been craving chicken nuggets for weeks, and no other chicken-like strip has been able to squelch my desire.
I've been lucky so far because I don't rally drive by a McDonald's that often. But this afternoon, after going to pick up some iron pills and gas up the car, I spotted one. It's towering golden arches gleamed in the sunlight and I could hear the faintest of whispers on the wind saying: "Chicken Nuggets, Chicken Nuggets....Chhhhiiiicccckkkkeeennnn Nuugggeeettttssss....". I didn't even blink as I drove through the drive thru and ordered a 9 piece with Sweet and Sour Sauce.
The Nugget thing is the probably the scariest of my food addictions, but some other notables have been pimento-stuffed Spanish olives, sour patch kids, plums, polish hotdogs, and funnel cake. John is the one who is usually put in the position of questioning my cravings. I of course remind him I'm pregnant, and then pull out my trump card - the "It must be something the baby needs!". After two pregnancies, John doesn't fall for this song and dance anymore. His reply is something like "Pretty sure the baby doesn't need all those "nutrients" in the Sour Patch Kids." HA! And where did you get your medical degree, buddy? Correspondence School?
But the Funnel Cake thing may be evidence of how far my psychosis has gone. This past Saturday we went to the Oregon State Fair. We took the kids to see all the animals (Chloe asked for a pony!), saw plenty of crafts and things, and of course, ate. One of the rules of any fair is to have funnel cake. We all sat in a shady patch of grass and shared a gigantic one.
Now, if I were a normal, rational human, my tale would end there. But as it stands, I woke up the following morning and remembered that we had been given two tickets for free admission good on Friday. I realized that these tickets were gold mines! I work only minutes from the fair, and I could go get a funnel cake at lunchtime! I recruited one of my best work buddies to do a drive by at the fair on Thursday. She dropped me off at one of the gates, and I ran in, got a funnel cake, and ran back out. All of the ticket-takers were looking at me like the lunatic I was and am. Jenn, my friend, drove back by and I hopped in the car laughing. It felt like a moment from high school. But I had my funnel cake, and that’s all that mattered.
Vasectomies
We’ve been dealing with the topic of vasectomies for the past few months. As I mentioned before this baby was an unexpected, albeit happy, surprise. John and I are both young, John just turned 26 and I will be 28 in December. It is unusual for people our age to be expecting a third child already. But we know that our resources will be stretched thin, and we want to help ensure that we will keep our family at 3 kids.
We knew that for us, sterilization was the way to go. After some talk, we decided that John should be the one to get a vasectomy. This is for two reasons: One, it’s much easier for a man to get a vasectomy than it is for a woman to get a tubal ligation. Second, after 27 months of pregnancy, 40 some odd months of nursing and 3 labors and deliveries by the end of all of this, we figure it’s a fair trade off for John.
What we can't decide is whether to get one before the baby is born or after. If we do it before then there would be no risk of getting pregnant again and it would fall under this year's insurance payments and deductible. But what if, and I shudder to even mention it, something happens to the Jellybean? I can't imagine that it would be a good idea to try and replace her, but at the same time, I'm not sure how I would feel if such a tragedy occurred.
If we wait until after the baby is born, I would worry about getting pregnant again. A man can be fertile for several months after having a vasectomy, and I can just imagine how hectic things would be if I got pregnant in February or March. Of course, we would take on that responsibility without looking back, but the question is, why do that if we can prevent that from happening. So, I’m curious - does anyone have any ideas or suggestions?
My midwives
I haven’t really talked much about them, but I love my midwife group. They are some of the most supportive and informative women I have ever met. Every appointment with them is something I look forward too, without a doubt. Typically, I wait only 5 minutes to be called back. I know everyone by first name, and they always remember me. I do the whole “pee-in-a-cup” routine, get weighed, etc, and then I can pick out a room to have the remainder of my appointment in. My favorite room is the lavender room, and I usually pick that one unless someone is already in it. The assistants always offer me a glass of water or tea, and within a few minutes, one of the midwives comes in. There are two main midwives and two intern midwives. Each woman is assigned one of each to be at her birth – mine are Amika and Heather.
The appointments themselves last about 60 minutes, and cover a wide range of topics. Amika, the midwife I’ve seen the most, always asks if she can measure my uterus, or listen for the heartbeat. It’s such an act of respect for her to do that, and I always appreciate it. We talk about the pregnancy, what I’m experiencing, and she notes everything down. I’ve never seen a medical care professional that kept better notes than these women. They always how I’m feeling emotionally, and I appreciate this too. My OB would have never thought to ask me such a question, yet I think it really affects a woman and her pregnancy.
At my last appointment, for example, I was a wreck. I have been having a hard time at work (nothing to do with the dingbats I wrote about last time), and was feeling completely stressed out. In part, it was my fault, because I have a difficult time telling people no, even when something is not my job. So, when Amika asked me how I was feeling emotionally, I opened my mouth to answer, and I just started crying. I felt awful and embarrassed, but Amika managed to console me without making me feel silly. We talked about my needs, and that I needed to be more assertive at work, especially with people who are in positions over me.
After I left, I realized how lucky I was to have such care for my pregnancy. The fact that not only someone asked me how I was feeling, but that I felt comfortable enough to really tell them says a lot about these women. I’ve included a link to their site in this entry – please feel free to check it out. I truly love going there, and I know that my birth experience with them will be great as well.
Other Stuff
We’ve been trying to teach Chloe the names that we are considering for this Jellybean, and her pronunciation of them is hilarious.
After several attempts at the name currently in the lead, she was able to pronounce “Bajellie”. I can safely say that no one will be able to extract the name we are considering from this, so I decided to write about it. All of the sudden, the baby’s nickname is “Bajellie”. Chloe run’s up to my stomach, places her hand on my belly, and says, “How’s Bajellie?” I only hope that if we choose the name that was the inspiration for this pronunciation, Chloe will learn how to say it quickly.
In a weird, non-pregnancy related note, Ivan, who will be two next month, has started signing with his hands. Ivan doesn’t really talk, a source of worry for us, of course. His pediatrician has insisted that we wait and see what happens, since his hearing is perfect. I know some kids are on different developmental tracks than “the norm”, but his recent invention of signing has me convinced that something else may be going on. It’s obvious that he’s intelligent and intuitive – he’s making up signs for things left and right – but it’s also obvious that he needs to communicate and this is the only way he can. I’m calling his pediatrician this week, and if she doesn’t see him, I’m going straight to a specialist. It’s okay if he needs different things than Chloe; I just need to know what those things are.
Hope everyone else is well and have a great two weeks!
Heather r
Mom to Chloe, Ivan and “Bajellie”
Due December 8, 2001
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