When I was a meat-eater, no one ever seemed to mind my bringing an extra dish to food gatherings. When you are vegetarian, however, it's sometimes seen as an affront, a statement that, hey, your food isn't good enough for us to eat, so we've brought our own. So, I've discovered that if you do bring a dish, the focus should be less on "food for us" and more on "more food for everyone." If you do wish to bring something like an un-turkey (made with seitan) that is clearly an alternative to the meat on the table, I think it's only fair to clear it with the host ahead of time. When you call, focus on the gathering that you are looking forward to visiting with family, and by the way, do you mind if I bring this vegetarian option for our family. Unless you are a vegan and don't consume dairy, including butter, I've found that there really is a lot that you can eat at the standard Thanksgiving or Turkey dinner.

Family relationships can be fragile things, and I believe the focus of the season is love, sharing and peace. So, I choose not to flout family tradition and refuse to attend family gatherings on principle. Other vegetarian families I know, however, do choose this option, planning a meat-free gathering at their own home instead. Only you can gauge what will be acceptable to your family and works with your vegetarian values and lifestyle, but if you keep things positive and focus on family rather than food, you can make it peacefully through the holiday season!

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