First of all, many men who will eventually be enthusiastic about a pregnancy/new baby often get very scared initially. Reasons for that vary but most men get concerned about finances. Can they afford the baby? How will it affect their lifestyle? Many men also secretly worry that their wives will have less time for them, which tends to be true, but it isn't fatal. Couples can become even closer after a baby arrives despite the fact that couple-time is compromised.

I don't know your specific fears and do not wish to minimize them. But I suspect that your wife will be open to hearing your worries as long as you also give many reassurances that you love her and that you fully expect to be madly in love with baby (someday).

Don't start your discussion on a sour note. Show affection, smile and find something positive and meaningful to say about the pregnancy. "You will be a terrific mother. I love watching you be so happy. What's it feel like to be pregnant?" Then it's OK to say you are somewhat scared as long as you are clear that you aren't trying to talk her out of the pregnancy.

If she gets annoyed or upset when you speak of your fears, let her know that you have every reason to expect that those fears will get worked out and that you will be delighted with the baby. But you cannot help worrying – after all, that's what parents do!

Also, despite being on cloud nine, she will have her moments of anxiety or worry. You can use those moments as springboards to mention your worries. Mentioning worries is fine as long as the fundamental message says "We'll be fine; we'll be happy; our worries will get smaller over time." Inject optimism while discussing your worries, and your wife will hear you out.

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